just for fun
'The Dog Ate My Car Keys’
Amid recession, war, and general anxiety, how about some comic relief? Here are some of the most unusual and creative excuses employees have offered for arriving late to work.
FORTUNE
Monday, March 24, 2003
By Anne Fisher
We've all had them--those mornings when everything that can go wrong, does. Worldwide staffing company Accountemps (http://www.accountemps.com) recently polled managers at 1,000 large U.S. companies and asked, "What are some of the more creative excuses you've heard for why employees are late for work or meetings?" Other than childcare-related delays, the most cited reasons involved canine companions.
A sampling of the survey responses:
"The dog was asleep behind the car, so I couldn't back out of the driveway."
"My dog swallowed my car keys."
"My dog didn't come back after I let him out."
Or consider these commuting calamities:
"I hit a mountain lion on the way to work." Employees also told of run-ins with moose and bears.
"A helicopter landed in the street and I couldn't get around it."
"My garage door was frozen shut."
"The elevators in this building are too slow."
"I tried a new way in to work and it took me two hours."
"The traffic lights were mistimed on my way in."
"My wife and son took both cars and when I went outside there was nothing in the driveway."
Then there were the breakfast challenges:
"A long line at the McDonald's drive-thru held me up."
"The line at Starbucks was out the door."
"The waitress spilled a latte on me."
What's really amazing is that anyone could offer the excuses below with a straight face:
"I forgot what day it was. I thought it was the weekend."
"I couldn't remember what time zone I was in."
"I couldn't find a tie to match my shirt."
"My roommate locked me in the bathroom."
"I'm not late. I decided to change my hours to make them more convenient."
"We had a death in the family." (This would have been a valid excuse if the employee in question hadn't already told his boss that the same family member had died several months earlier...)
"The wind was blowing against me."
"My favorite actress got married. I needed time alone."
"My husband's pet spider died and I had to console him."
"I felt it was better to sleep at home rather than at the office."
"The bartender wouldn't let me leave."
What? No one claimed to have been kidnapped by aliens? In fact, believe it or not, the survey found that this excuse has been tried more than once. Paging Agents Mulder and Scully. Of course, if you're part of a team with one or more members who habitually show up late, there's nothing particularly amusing about it. Has anyone come up with an effective way to get these folks in line? If so, please share it with the rest of us.
Many thanks to all who responded to my request in last week's column to send in the toughest interview questions you've had to grapple with--and, for anyone who may have missed that, please send me an e-mail with yours, too! Drake Beam Morin consultant Alan Kramer will join us in a future column with can't-miss answers |
